Worst line of commentary?

songsofglory

Well-Known Member
Always seems to be some belters, especially from Ex Pundits like Michael Owen.

My favourite bit though was the first game of the Russia World Cup. Camera pans round to the Russia manager sitting with a big moustache. John Motson (i think) hits out with "That's some moustache there...remember Stalin and his moustache?" Followed by a very awkward silence.
 
jock brown when we humped the mentally challengeds at the parkhead, sure it was the 4-2 new years game and either mcstay or john collins halved stuart mccall, really late high challenge

'tigerish tacking just a shade over zealous'
 
jock brown when we humped the mentally challengeds at the parkhead, sure it was the 4-2 new years game and either mcstay or john collins halved stuart mccall, really late high challenge

'tigerish tacking just a shade over zealous'
Another from Joke Broon the day we won 3 in a row v the sheep. "After assessing the pattern of play, Walter Smith has replaced Tom Cowan". He had a broken leg FFS!!
 
Motson saying Kuntz after talking about two players commentating at a German game. (Stefan Kuntz)

Seem to remember Andy Goram co-commentating on a European game and pretty much swearing through the entire match :))
 
Another from Joke Broon the day we won 3 in a row v the sheep. "After assessing the pattern of play, Walter Smith has replaced Tom Cowan". He had a broken leg FFS!!
The camera was actually on Cowan being stretchered off behind the goal at the Broomloan when he said it.
 
Last edited:
An archie classic,,,when they had the japenese player,,,, "the wee Japanese is going doon the wing" that was just about the time eurosport binned him
 
Whoever was doing the beast cluj game came away with this cracker around the 75 minute This is a hail mary moment, I had to rewind it as I thought my ears were deceiving me but no thats what he said
 
One that always makes me laugh is our Tom last season on one of our games on RTV, one of the opposition players tried to dink the ball over our keeper but it sailed way over the bar and Tom subtle as you like hits out with "and that, Andy little, is what you call a soggy chip"
 
No idea how many times over the years Crocker mentioned Papac was the last PLG signing. Was sure he kept mentioning someone every time we played QoS as well, but might have been the Wee Prime Minister when we played Airdrie (Ian McMillan)
 
Last edited:
David Coleman at the WC - ‘he’s done a job all over the park’ not sure who was referring to.
 
I really, really hate Martin Tyler’s “And it’s live!” that he’s been trying to make into a catchphrase for a couple of years now.

I mean it’s a true statement but does he really need to say it?
 
One that sticks in my mind was from the League decider v the sheep in 1991, that utter knob Jock Brown saying something like "Having assessed the pattern of play, Walter Smith has decided to replace young Tom Cowan"......as the boy was being carried round the pitch with a broken leg!
 
Whoever was doing the beast cluj game came away with this cracker around the 75 minute This is a hail mary moment, I had to rewind it as I thought my ears were deceiving me but no thats what he said

That's a commonly used term that originates from American Football. Basically means throwing caution to the wind and chucking the kitchen sink at your opponent.
 
  • Like
Reactions: VGM
I think it was "..the blue is behind the pink"

:)):))
Yes, something like that. Brilliant! You can just imagine the look on people’s faces watching o_O

Assuming you're a bit of a younger bear?

After a game live on ITV Atkinson didn't realise the gear was still recording and in discussing Desailly's poor performance he said "That is what is known, in some schools, as a lazy, thick ******"
@a_weir true story dat :eek:
 
Assuming you're a bit of a younger bear?

After a game live on ITV Atkinson didn't realise the gear was still recording and in discussing Desailly's poor performance he said "That is what is known, in some schools, as a lazy, thick ******"

Not at all. Well, it's all relative but I'm almost 30.

Genuinely never knew about this.
 
Where is the posts slagging our Tom.

I know you want to :D

When you see the names mentioned I am glad we have Tom Miller.

Love the bloke.
 
I remember one years ago during the Scottish Open I'm sure.

Camera is focused on the crowd and centre of the shot is a little boy standing eating a hotdog beside his rather overweight dad.

Commentator pipes up with " A few more of them and he will be just like his dad"

Think the fact it was during the golf of all things that made me buckle.
 
Not at all. Well, it's all relative but I'm almost 30.

Genuinely never knew about this.
Monaco v Chelsea, in their run to the final. Shabani Nonda scoring the goals to knock Chelsea out, if I recall correctly.

A note to add, completely forgot Dado Prso opened the scoring that night.
 
Last edited:
4 Priests Spew

1997 "... if we're honest, Rangers winning 9iar has ruined the game here in Scotland"
2019 "... 9iar would be a remarkable achievement"
 
“Cold, very cold links golf. Ken Brown used to soak his balls in warm water for half an hour before playing, that did the trick”

Mark James commentating at the Open
 
Not necessarily a commentary faux pas but this blinding piece of punditry/analysis about why Joe Hart is holding up 4 fingers from Jamie Rednap has got to be up there.

 
Ron Pickering: "and there goes Juantorena down the back straight, opening his legs and showing his class"
 
Back
Top