Best professional footballer's 'put down' of an opposition player?

George Goudie

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The julie cacking himself thread where he boasts (and lies) that he's a £7m internationalist to the Livingstone players got me thinking.

My favourite 'put down' is the Alan Hutton story.

Down at the Rangers end near the corner flag Alan intercepts an attack and successfully plays the ball to safety. Opposition forward for insignificant diddy club says to Alan: "your a dick!"

Alan retorts: "my Bentley says I'm not!"
 
Can't beat Robbie (or was it Roy) Keane telling the Clyde players that he made more in an hour than they did in a week. We know who had the last laugh there, not very good value for money were the Keane's...
 
Heard a story that a burd came up to Charlie Miller in a boozer and asked for an autograph . He signed a bit of paper and gave it to said burd. She ripped it up in his face and called him a wanker. He took a £20 note out his pocket, ripped it up in front of her and said if you can afford to do that then you can talk down to me
 
Heard Willie Henderson tell a story of his time at Sheffield Wednesday...
He admitted that both he and the Wednesday team had had a particularly poor first half in a game at Hillsborough;and as the teams made their way down the tunnel at half time,an opposition defender called out from behind him...... `Henderson,you`re shite!`
Willie retorted `At least you know my name son; I haven`t got a f*cking clue who you are!` :))
 
Don't know the validity of this story but if it's not true maybe it should be.

When Brian Martin of Motherwell and Mark Hateley were doing a typical physical battle on the field big Mark tried to wind him up by saying " I've got a Ferrari, a Bentley and a Range Rover in my drive, what have you got"?

Martin " Three tons of driveway chips"
 
The julie cacking himself thread where he boasts (and lies) that he's a £7m internationalist to the Livingstone players got me thinking.

My favourite 'put down' is the Alan Hutton story.

Down at the Rangers end near the corner flag Alan intercepts an attack and successfully plays the ball to safety. Opposition forward for insignificant diddy club says to Alan: "your a dick!"

Alan retorts: "my Bentley says I'm not!"
Alan Hutton: Do you know who I am?
Bouncer at The Shed: Aye that shite fullback for Rangers

(This was when PLG was manager and most of us would have been happy to lose him on a free)
 
My brother telt me on re Darren Jackson.
when he was at the Dabs he was out and about with fellow players being Billy Big Time. They tried to get in a night club and being worse for wear he was refused.
"De ye know who ah um?"
Bouncer who was a Dabs fan and knew alright "Naw who ur ye?"
"Ah'm Darren Jackson"
Bouncer "Ah dinnae care if yer fhuckin Michael Jackson, yer no gettin' in now fhuck oof."
 
Cheating here but my favourite is from the world of cricket. Player 1- Why are you such a fat bastard?
Player 2- Because every time I shag your wife I eat a biscuit...
As you started with the cricket ones I will raise you this one:
In a county cricket game in England, Greg Thomas was bowling to arguably the greatest batter of all time, Viv Richards. Thomas was bowling fast and beating Richards' bat. Thomas, thinking he was well on top, said: “It's red, it's round. Now hit it!".

Richards took his advice and hit the next ball out of the ground.

Richards then said to Thomas: "You know what it looks like, now go and get it."
 
was at that game, last minute tackle by big tam,, great day

Enjoy from about 7.35.:))

 
Alan Hutton: Do you know who I am?
Bouncer at The Shed: Aye that shite fullback for Rangers

(This was when PLG was manager and most of us would have been happy to lose him on a free)
Heard the exact same story but it was Maurice Ross who got the KB in the version I was told.
 
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Baxter at Wembley in 67 just after England had won the World Cup, wee Alan Ball was run ragged by Baxter. He was running around shouting swearing in his wee squeaky voice, Baxter casually strolls by him and says you’ll be some player wee man once your voice breaks
Similar one from wembley 67.......Baxter in full swing playing keepiuppie and taking the piss, Ball says to him ‘who the fu@k do you think you are’, Baxter looks at him and just says ‘The greatest’......end of conversation.
 
Not quite sure if this fits in with your line of questioning in the thread but when Gazza nutmegged the Thistle player and then doubled over n looked through his legs at him is a favourite of mine . I’m sure there’s a YouTube clip of it somewhere
He nutmegged Billy McDonald - who was sent off because of his response.

It's at about 9:23 in this video :D but keep watching until after he's sent off because then you'll see the nutmeg in slo-mo ...

 
From the Secret Footballer

Banter got more and more tired. I enjoyed, at the end, a guy like Nemanja Vidic at United. I once asked him to swap jerseys with me at the end of the match. I just wanted to annoy him. 'Thanks',' I said, when he handed it over. 'I have to clean the car during the week. This is perfect. I'll text you a pic.'

'Yeah, no problem,' said Vidic. 'Same here, but I'll have to send you pictures of all my cars one by one if that's OK?'
 
Baxter at Wembley in 67 just after England had won the World Cup, wee Alan Ball was run ragged by Baxter. He was running around shouting swearing in his wee squeaky voice, Baxter casually strolls by him and says you’ll be some player wee man once your voice breaks
Baxter was calling him Jimmy Clitheroe during the game (young bears might need to Google Jimmy Clitheroe)
In fairness Ball was a very decent player but not Baxters level.
 
He nutmegged Billy McDonald - who was sent off because of his response.

It's at about 9:23 in this video :D but keep watching until after he's sent off because then you'll see the nutmeg in slo-mo ...

I forgot about MacDonald he ran around like a rabid dog in matches against us trying to kick anything in blue.
 
May not be a popular choice given his most recent antics, but I fondly remember Kirk Broadfoot chipping the ball over Aiden McGeady’s head before dashing for the byeline in front of the Bears at the scum hut.

Wee Aiden gets the hump at Broadfoots uncharacteristic moment of Messi-esque skill and takes him down. Kirk gets of the deck laughing at the scrote.

Wish I could find the clip, t’was quality.
 
Shortly after Souness joined Samp, Daniel Passarella spent weeks talking to the media about how he was the real hard man in the league and he’d sort Souness out.

First game they play against each other, Passarella leaves on a stretcher within 15 mins of kick off !

Actions speak louder than words !

Passarella before next game threatens to do Souness. Souness was asked was he worried about Passarella’s threatened retribution Souness replied to reporter only when I have my back to him.
 
No professional but when I was playing in South Africa, we used to have a wee guy from Glasgow called Scott upfront, he was a right cheeky wee bassa, but some finisher. Finished top scorer in the league every season. We were in the top three teams in the league. One of the other teams was from a Portuguese neighborhood in Johannesburg. Their captain was about 6 foot 4 center back and a right nasty bastard, dirty as, and always trying to wind up the wee fella upfront.

The big center back had his right arm amputated from the elbow down.....

After a fiercely contested game in which we won 1-0, and the wee fella had been battered about by this big lump of lad. Scott walked up to big guy and was telling him well played mate, well played while tucking his hand under his elbow and making a shaking elbows gesture to him.......the big man did not take it too well and a fracas ensued :D I was pissing myself
 
At the bank in Glasgow Airport. Wee Wully tried to skip the line up and eventually shouted, I'm Wully Henderson of the Rangers. Back came the reply from the Teller. I'm *** ******* of the Royal Bank get back to the end of the line.
 
Passarella before next game threatens to do Souness. Souness was asked was he worried about Passarella’s threatened retribution Souness replied to reporter only when I have my back to him.
I believe he flattened Passarella in the tunnel after passarella kicked f()ck out of Trevor Francis
 
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