Football jargon

[strider]

Later than everyone else but in time for the ball maybe?

I suppose we could stretch it to that!

 

[Dugsy]

I suppose we could stretch it to that!

I’m trying hard here!!

 

[dougsdir24]

he has got that in his locker!
what, scud pictures?

 

[RAFBob]

Bidding war.

 

[Rickety Cricket]

Wonderkid

Applies to any signing that happens to be under the age of 18. The majority of which you never hear of ever again.

That's probably been taken from champ manager/Football Manager

 

[lanarkshire_bear]

Players / managers talking about 'lessons learned' after a defeat, usually before they go and do the exact same thing wrong again in the next game.

 

[HarryBosch]

"It's a poor penalty, if the keeper goes the right way he saves that" - but he didnae.

"You could have two keepers and they aren't stopping that" - Yes, yes they would.

Kid Gloves - any goalie under 30

"Keeper are all mad" - are they? Your busting your arse for 90 minutes up and down the park while they're mostly standing around -and they're the mad ones?

Dutch Masters - it's tired.

 

[Alfie shhh!]

Football is a game for simpletons. That's why it's the most popular sport in the world.

To disguise this, we add thousands of different terms to make it appear complicated. And we try to convince women that the offside rule involves some kind of brain breaking physics. Feck off you single brain celled amoeba cunts!

Feel better for that rant

 

[Peter_OHanrahahanrahan]

Ian Crockofshit has a barrel load of his own cliches.

“You just knew (player x) would have a say…ON DERBY DAY!”

“This is incredible! This is remarkable! This is astonishing!”

 

[Peter_OHanrahahanrahan]

Players / managers talking about 'lessons learned' after a defeat, usually before they go and do the exact same thing wrong again in the next game.

“We’ll take our medicine”

 

[Always Ready]

Football is a game for simpletons. That's why it's the most popular sport in the world.

To disguise this, we add thousands of different terms to make it appear complicated. And we try to convince women that the offside rule involves some kind of brain breaking physics. Feck off you single brain celled amoeba cunts!

Feel better for that rant

That's also why self-styled thinking football fans love 'thinking footballers'. It makes them feel less guilty about being football fans. So as soon as they see a footballer reading Harry Potter they herald him as an intellectual. Pat Nevin comes to mind.

 

[Mickethius]

Mostly used by media reporters to sensationalise a story or non story around transfer windows.

Jetted in
Swooped
Snapped up
Ace

There must be more equally as bad.

Snapped up does my box in, are the journo's so challenged that they have to regurgitate this shite.

 

[Mickethius]

On a similar theme, players and managers that talk behind their hands, talk about inflating your own ego ffs.

 

[GazzaLegend]

“a Daily Record source said”

 

[GazzaG]

When a goal is disallowed is it “chopped off” or “chalked off”.

Either way, it’s water off a dugs back to me

Even worse when a goal isn't "chalked off"

Red Star at Ibrox being the perfect example.
For a full week we were treated to tales of how lucky we were with Red Stars "3 goals".
Even on here we had posters parroting the nonsense they'd had 3 goals disallowed.

No, the flag was up so play was dead.
The fact the player then put the ball in the net means fùck all.

Nobody ever had a corner or goal kick disallowed under the same circumstances.