Things the Celtic Cleaner has done

[Lemmy]

Slipped Kevin Kelly rohypnol so that he wouldn’t remember.

 

[Dxdave]

Flicked a switch in Johnny Doyle's house

 

[Davie_Mitchell]

Is the answer.... took a bit of paper out the bin and took a photo of it thinking it was a list of people invited to a slumber party in the BJK Suite?

 

[Sam English]

It would appear that she does everything but clean

 

[Spiderman]

The jobby in the bath that Gazza got the blame for.

 

[2longinxile]

actually f**ked the torry rope .

 

[Zander73]

Flicked a switch in Johnny Doyle's house

Brilliant

 

[Riot Girl]

Faked the moon landings

 

[LiveItUp]

Wrote and directed the last ever game of thrones episode

 

[Zander73]

Applied for the kit mans job at Hamilton

 

[theytriedtokillus]

Stole triggers brush.

 

[Skeletor]

Wee Jay

 

[klosrfc]

Created ISIS

 

[Rangers daft]

Signed Scott allan

 

[Garribaldy]

She told the fat Japanese to use the separate entity line.

 

[Grumpyoldman1950]

Only puts green bins out totally confusing the bin men on blue bin day

 

[Ticketybloo]

Drop the bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

 

[The HighlandBullpen]

Who’ll make their statements now?

 

[Gordy61]

Shat in a Lidl bag

 

[charlie_snowball]

Sang 'Everything I do (I do it for you)'.

 

[DJ Blue]

Was Brenda's on/off mistress

 

[ColinA]

Sweep sweep

 

[Garribaldy]

Was Brenda's on/off mistress

Are you saying she's a cleaner with a wiener

 

[Beer Belly Loyal]

Allowed her pet pigeon to escape in 2009.

 

[Tommyhlrsc]

Going by her age, memories of my youth and the penny slots in Blackpool - She was the one who fu(ked the butler.

 

[Echo_1]

Swept less under the carpet than any of her non-cleaning colleagues, ironically.

 

[Square Deal Sam]

Ate 3 shreddies.

 

[ScotiaPapac]

Shagged the monkey that kicked off the AIDS epidemic.

 

[Datman]

Ate the boiled ham raw

 

[ScotiaPapac]

Said to Kurt Cobain ‘Aye, yir only smokin’ it’.

 

[ScotiaPapac]

Made Vince McMahon lose the Battle of the Billionaires, thus paving the way for Trump to become President of the USA.

 

[ScotiaPapac]

Kicked a young Adolf Hitler out of Art School.

 

[The Royal Standard]

Didn’t call the police

 

[ScotiaPapac]

Sometime around 33ad she started a chant of ‘Barabbas’.

 

[Peter Venkman]

Booked the flights for the tour of Japan

 

[Dalmuirbear]

Took Madeleine Mccann from her apartment.

Cnut beat me to it

That’s a fairly big admission mate for an Internet forum, has Scotland Yard been in touch?

 

[Blue Goose]

She found out that Fritzel and Desmond is the same man.

 

[Stoorie]

Lost the “patsy” alter ego and gave up knitting.

 

[Mermaid]

Deleted the Rita Kaneava thread

 

[Unicorn]

Framed Roger Rabbit.

 

[Shengus Malengus]

Farted oot a mong with fat thumbs.

 

[DJ Blue]

Took out JFK from the Grassy Knoll

 

[Laudrup97]

She reminds me of that woman who done the interview with a bheast fan group.

"So what did you think of the game today"


...

"Sh#te!"

 

[Porrohman]

Cut John Wayne Bobbit's cock off

 

[Oasis]

She reminds me of that woman who done the interview with a bheast fan group.

"So what did you think of the game today"


...

"Sh#te!"

“The caley thistle fans wur pullin oor players doon in the boax”

 

[Rossy1872]

Wrote the script for Godfather Part 3.

 

[Bumplittledipper]

Devised the separate entity ploy.

Changed Irn Bru

Could believe it wasnt butter

 

[Square and compass]

Hey, you never know about the cleaner, look at Hong Kong Phoey, he was just “ a mild mannered janitor”.

 

[Vallance]

The Shake 'n' Vac.

 

[muttley]

Helped the Russians rig the US elections.