Truly countless, stupid shit happening every day. Mobile phones and Americans, a bad mixture. There was the case of a guy who splattered shit and piss all over the floor, walls, and even ceiling of our toilets. Twice before we banned him, but I don't want to go into that in any more detail .
So we will go with an i'm being hacked wacko of which there were countless. We would see new ones every day, or the same ones every day.
This guy was in a couple of times a week over a month or so, said he was being hacked and it's our problem because we sold him the phone. Get that for starters.
We sell him a phone, any issues with apps then it's our problem not his. In his view. They would come in with facebook issues and insist it's our problem because we sold them the phone. And Facebook was on it. And that's pretty much what this wacko was about.
Week after week he would come in, hacked again and what he was actually rambling about was facebook. We told him to change his facebook password which he said he did. Back again next day hacked again.
He eventually wants to trade the phone in and get another, while insisting he better not get hacked on this new phone because that will be our fault and there will be hell to pay. He's not paying good money for a phone to be hacked.
About two hours after getting the new phone he storms in again and actually threw the phone at a female sales assistant hitting her. Hacked again after just two hours, you bastards can't sell me a non hacked phone.
And this time there was a new bit we hadn't heard before, it was his ex girlfriend hacking him he says and he was going to gouge her eyes out.
Upshot of it was one of our guys punched him in the face as he was pushing the female around then everybody piled in. That was glorious, we all hated this fucked up mental case.
They zip tied his hands and feet called the cops and he was arrested. While they were taking him away he was screaming that he was going to sue us for assaulting him for absolutely nothing. One guy couldn't resist responding see what the judge says when we show him the CCTV from all the camera around this room you asshole.
Countless stories some not even involving crazies which was most of them. One night we're sitting around watching telly cos it's quiet then we can see blue and red lights flashing outside in the car park.
Goes over to the glass to look out and this big brown cow went storming past the window with cops in hot pursuit. They were trying to like round it up with bodies and cars and that wasn't working.
It played them all around the car park for a couple of minutes then left the car park went round a corner and I couldn't see it anymore.
We were told it hasdescaped from a slaughter house. Oh and how about the Dumpstons. There were beggars out at the traffic lights at the junctions in front of our store every day all day. It must be a good earning begging spot or something. And beggars are infinitely more common in Oklahoma than I ever saw in Scotland. There's homeless everywhere.
The Dumpstons was what we called this guy and woman who lived in a little fenced area at the back of the store which had dumpsters for we and other stores to throw our garbage in. We would go out there and rather than bother opening the gate we would just toss it over the top into the dumpster.
One of our guys is out doing that one night. He throws a bag of garbage over the top then hears a shout from inside and a head pops up over the fence. It was Mr Dumpston, and he said "hey, i'm building something in here"
Our guy just says okay sorry and leaves. We had a look in there next day when they weren't around and there are these rack things with shelves they have in Walmart which they put the plant pots and stuff on in the gardening section.
They had either acquired or nicked one of these rack thingies and had put it against the fence at the back of the dumpster bay and were placing little ornaments on it. You know, making the place presentable.
They were eventually evicted. There was a Chinese takeaway next door using the same dumpster area and they feared the Dumpstons eating out of their dumpster then the takeaway gets in trouble somehow. The takeaway got the cops to hound them out of there.